‘Find The Traitor And Crush Him,’ Announces Bill Belichick To Monstrous Linebackers Birthed From Foxborough Mud Pits

FOXBOROUGH, MA—Moments after the titanic abominations burst from the realm’s mudpits into the brimstone-tinged air, Patriots head coach Bill Belichick bid a legion of monstrous linebackers to find the traitor Tom Brady and crush him, sources confirmed Friday. “Go! Go now! You know your task, you miserable wretch!”…

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https://sports.theonion.com/find-the-traitor-and-crush-him-announces-bill-belich-184620692918462069290001-01-01 00:00:00Z2021-02-05 21:00:00Z